I have had a most rare vision.

I love saying various actors' names into my Roku device and seeing what movies or old TV shows might be available for free. 

And it was in doing so that I found the 1968 A Midsummer Night's Dream for free on Pluto TV last night (via my Roku device), featuring a lot of very young British actors that are now giants of stage and screen: David Warner as Lysander, Diana Rigg as Helena, Helen Mirren as Hermia, Judi Dench as Titania, Ian Holm as Puck and lots more familiar faces, all young and fresh and earnest and fearless. (you can easily guess which name I had used to discover this, if you know me at all)

I watched about half of it (I was sleepy). 

It's VERY primitive in terms of filming and special effects (think high schoolers in the 70s filming with one super 8 camera, or in the 80s with videotape). It's clear that they had to dub it later because they didn't have sound equipment, and the dubbing still makes the sound muddy. I think they wore their own clothes (or no clothes at all). They filmed almost entirely outside (no budget for lighting for anything indoors). There are no fade-ins or fade-outs, special effects are done from quick jump edits and lighting that looks like flashlights, and on and on. 

And yet... it's really wonderful to see how British actors just GO FOR IT, go all-in regarding their performances, damn the poor filming quality, damn the lack of any budget whatsoever, damn how cold they were in most of the scenes. They hold nothing back. It's delightful.

But let's face it: Mark Lamos' 1988 production of A Midsummer Night's Dream at Hartford Stage in Connecticut ruined all productions for those of us who saw it, because his was PERFECT!!! There are a couple of staging choices he made that I cannot get out of my head, like how Titania delivers the line, I pray thee, gentle mortal, sing again, sitting astride Bottom in the most provocative way... I've never seen a production that interpreted that line that way. 

We need theater. We need it SO MUCH. We need to sit in darkened theaters or fully lit public parks or and empty field or, really, anywhere, together, and see people pretending to be something else, delivering a compelling story. We need to laugh together, cry together, be delighted together as we share in the experience. 

We are all losing our humanity because of this damn virus and the people who refuse to get vaccinated.

Also see my 2012 blog about loving Shakespeare, when I was trying to read all the plays. 

And my blog Lovin' the Bard has been the most popular personal blog I've ever written.

Sometimes people leave you

Confession: I'm not a big fan of Sondheim musicals. Guess I'm just not sophisticated enough. But being a theatre kid, his music has been all around me, starting my freshman year at university - I was even in a Sondheim review at WKU. And I do love Into the Woods except for the song, "Into the Woods." 

When I went to the movie of Into the Woods, I was snickering after the movie started and I heard someone behind me whispering, "IS THIS A MUSICAL?!?" No one walked out, so that's impressive. 

I was enjoying the movie - just a nice way to spend the day after Christmas. And it got to the Baker's Wife singing, "Sometimes people leave you" and WHAM, out of the blue, I think I made a noise as I completely and suddenly burst into tears. Whew - I still get chills thinking about it. I had to wait until all the credits were over so that I was pulled together enough to leave the theater. 

Whether I'm a big fan or not, I am absolutely in awe of his creativity, talent, influence and incredible output, and he is part of the soundtrack of my life. Very sad to see him go.

Thanksgiving Day 2021

8 a.m.: Create a Facebook album for 22 memes that I think are hilarious and need to be shared. Responses are many and positive. 

10:30 a.m.: Walk the dogs. 

11 a.m.: Make deviled eggs for the first time. Take a photo to show just how serious I am about this endeavor. 

Finish. Eat one broken egg to ensure I've done it all properly, share on egg with Stefan so he's not left out, chill the rest. 

noon: Put turkey in oven, clean kitchen, listen to Alice's Restaurant twice, singing along to the chorus every time. 

2 p.m. Sautee green beans in chopped garlic and onions. 

2:30 p.m. Prepare green bean casserole to bake

3:15 p.m. Take turkey out of oven, put in green bean casserole, begin chaos of trying to steam cauliflower, boil potatoes, make gravy and cook stuffing, all at the same time. 

4:15 p.m. Somehow serve everything on time, at the same time

Food on the table: Turkey, gravy, stuffing, green bean casserole, mashed potatoes with mashed cauliflower snuck in, deviled eggs and champagne. Meal was followed by pecan pie (which I did NOT make myself). 

Afterwards, put everything away in tupperware, fill dishwasher and press "start", boil turkey carcass to make broth and watch half of part one of Get Back. Collapse into bed at 9:30. 

So much to be thankful for: a beautiful, stable, peaceful home with someone I love. A table with an abundance of delicious food, on ceramic plates made in Stefan's hometown, Höhr-Grenzhausen, Germany, on placements from Central America, on a table cloth from Kandahar, Afghanistan. We're all connected whether we want to admit it or not. 

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. 

What it's like in Afghanistan now

A woman in Afghanistan I'm going to call "W--" has extensive connections with a USA NGO and, therefore, she must get out of Afghanistan. W-- is trying to get the rest of her family out as well. Here's what happened to W--’s husband and one of her daughters when they went to the passport office in Kabul, as told to me by someone affiliated with that NGO: 

A long-time family friend of W--'s family said he had a friend at the passport office that might be able to help get W-'s family passports, which some in her family do not already have. W--'s husband and B-- (female), a dear family friend, and B--'s father all went together to the passport office to see what they could find out.

There were several different lines at the Kabul passport office: one for people who needed a passport for getting medical care in another country, one for those who were renewing their passport, one for those who have already applied, and one for those who were applying for a new passport. B--, her father and W--'s husband were in this line.

Two Taliban singled the three out in the line - they approached the three and asked them several questions, including if they had documents or cell phones with them. They hadn’t brought anything with them - they were in line just to talk with the friend and see what they needed to do. When the three said they didn’t have any documents or phones with them, the Taliban took the three out of line and put them in the back of a covered truck/van. They put hoods on them so they couldn’t see where they were going and bound their hands in something metal - handcuffs or chains, they aren't sure.

One of their cousins happened to be at the passport office at the same time, standing in the line for people who had already applied for a passport. He saw what happened and called W-- immediately, so she would know what was happening.

The Taliban took the three to an unknown location and put them in a small room. They aggressively questioned W--'s husband about why he was with B-- when he wasn’t a relative. They beat W--'s husband badly.  B-- told the Taliban they had know this man for many years and he is like a family member. She asked them not to hurt her father because he has a heart condition. They hit her father anyway, on his shoulder and upper arm with an electrical metal cord. The beating left marks on his arm. They also beat B--, apparently on her back. B-- later said the beatings of B-- and her father weren’t “too bad" but W-'s husband was beaten badly. 

(stunned to hear a beating being described as "not too bad.")

After 18 hours, the Taliban let the three go, probably because they had no proof against them for whatever it was they wanted to accuse them of. 

The three went to W--'s empty in-laws house so they wouldn’t be at their actual home in case the Taliban followed them. The Taliban did, indeed, follow them to the home and entered the house asking where the rest of the family was. B-- didn’t know and said so.

Why were B--, her father and the friend singled out to be questioned and taken away? B-- said it seemed like the Taliban knew something about the family, but they didn’t accuse them of anything specific. The family has all been repeatedly told to hide all of their documents that show one of their family member's connection to the U.S. in a place no one can find, and they have done so.

While B-- was in custody, her husband took their three young daughters to his parents’ house and went to look for B--. He hasn’t resurfaced so they don’t know where he is. 

W-- and her family will return to their home in the next day or two. No one knows what will happen now. 

Alexi Lalas doesn't take the bait

I think Alexi actually means it. 

I will never be this good of a person when dealing with a troll. 

Congrats on your success

If you have ever intended to hurt my feelings, and you made an effort to do so, just FYI, mission accomplished. 

Hope & Mystery with Lucinda the Dog

Several of you have asked for a Lucinda update, so here it is. 

Monday was a month since her episode of paralysis. Since then, she's had no more. She's joined Kobe dog on short walks each evening more than a week ago. Yesterday morning, she joined Kobe for a short morning walk too. She was positively bouncy last weekend - her old self. And because, four weeks ago, I was convinced I might not even have her going into October, I'm so unbelievably hopeful and grateful. 

But cautious. 

Her lack of paralysis in the last four weeks has greatly confused the vets, and as a result, they can't answer the question I want most answered: does Lucy have Degenerative Myelopath (DM), in which case she has a fatal disease, or does she have Intervertebral Disk Disease (IVDD), in which case she has an injury that may heal through limited physical activity (or may need surgery eventually)?   

Right now, we're leaning towards IVDD. But we could be wrong. Really, only time will tell, because we can't afford a $4000 (or more!) MRI. 

Here's why she might have IVDD instead of DM:

• No paralysis in a month. If she had DM, she should have had another paralysis episode by now.
   
• The paralysis happened less than 48 hours after she had played with Bishop, a full-grown 70 pound or so puppy. He's about a year old, and he and Lucinda love each other beyond words. Bishop has never, ever been aggressive with her or tried to mount her. Most of their play is intense romping bitey face. But the romps are intense, with some body crashes during zoomies, and Lucy is ready for a rest long before Bishop. It's unusual for paralysis to show up so long after the fact, but it is possible. 
   
• She wouldn't lay completely on her side for most of the first two weeks. She would lay in a ball, or lay on her stomach, like a sphinx, but she wouldn't lay on either side and did no rolly pollies on her back. It wasn't clear to people that didn't know her, but it was clear to me: she was uncomfortable. DM is not supposed to cause pain - it causes numbness.  
   
• More than two weeks ago, she snapped at Kobe dog twice when he barely laid his head on her back. There is no way he hurt her - we've touched her there repeatedly to make sure. But she clearly did not want him to even dare to apply any pressure back there. It reminded me that she's snapped at two or three other dogs in the last year that she didn't know, ones her size or bigger, something she NEVER did in her first six years. I'd written off that change in behavior to pandemic social distancing - I thought I had accidentally taught her not to be friendly to new dogs. But maybe she's been sensitive to her back for a while now.
   
• Lucinda has always whimpered or yelped at some point when she's chewing her back left paw during a mani pedi. She moves her leg more than her head to do the chewing - she can bring the foot over completely to her mouth. And about once a week, when she is chewing that foot, she'll whimper or yelp. Dogs don't yelp unless they are in a LOT of pain - they will put up with a great deal of discomfort before they ever show signs that something hurts. The emergency vet said the paralysis was worst in her left leg, and you will recall the observation of my regular vet made about her left leg.
  

Here's why she might have DM instead of IVDD:

• She recovered from her paralysis in a few hours. That's typical of DM, not IVDD.
   
• The paralysis happened suddenly - Lucy got up for breakfast and during her meal, was just fine. She laid down in the living room like always - and two hours later, couldn't get up.
   
• The way her back curved as she tried to use her back legs, and the way she dragged her legs, was textbook DM, according to the emergency vet.
   
• If it's an injury, it would be so unusual for paralysis to show up so many hours after the supposed injury (in this case, about 40 hours later).
  

We still haven't done the genetic test to see if she carries the DM gene. I wanted to wait for Stefan to get home to help me (it's a bit complicated) and in this week since he's been back, he's been busy. We'll do that this weekend. 

Lucinda went off all pain meds and muscle relaxants more than two weeks ago. She now plays a little with Kobe for a few minutes each evening, to the point that I recently had to tell her two days ago to back off - SHE was getting too bouncy. The vet said it's up to me how physical I'm going to let her be, though he said not letting her play with dogs her size or bigger was probably a good idea (which breaks my heart, because we love Bishop and her other bouncy buddy, Beauregard, so, so much). 

I've decided I'll keep her on these short morning and evening walks, and I'll try her on her usual, long morning walk towards the end of October - or maybe early November. 

So many people seeing her now are saying, "But she looks fine." And she does. She looks absolutely like her old self. There is nothing at all to indicate there is anything at all wrong with her. But I'd rather be cautious, because if she is injured, I need to make certain not to do anything to make that injury worse. 

Is this a reprieve of months or years? I don't know. IVDD seems like the lesser of the two evils, but the reality is that, if she has IVDD then, eventually, she will have paralysis again. And the idea of her not playing with Bishop or Beauregard makes me tear up - she loves them so, so much. I think she'll be fine to play with much smaller dogs, but only in our backyard. 

We also have to face the reality that, no matter what she has, we're not going to get the years with her we wanted, and that she deserves. Of course, what dog parent does get that?

I will decide October 15th if I'm going to Sweden for my dear friend Alex's wedding in December. Right now, I'm feeling optimistic. 

With each week, we're going to know more about what she can and can't do. For now, I'm reveling in the unexpected joy that she's so happy and comfortable.