women can save the motorcycle industry

I am a motorcycle rider. I have been a motorcycle rider for just 10 years. I took a Motorcycle Safety Foundation course when I was 43, after thinking about it for many years. I've now ridden almost 50,000 miles, touring Oregon, Washington state, Northern California, Nevada, Utah, Idaho, Western Montana, British Columbia, a bit of the Yukon and Southern Alberta.

I am regularly approached by women in their 40s and 50s who, when they see me in the parking lot of a convenience store or realize I am a motorcycle rider say, "I always wanted to ride a motorcycle!" And I do my best to be super encouraging. I strongly suggest to them that they take the Motorcycle Safety Foundation course, or whatever is available in the area, explain that they don't need to have their own motorcycle or helmet, that that's provided (they have NO idea), that they will NOT be the only woman in the class, and on and on. I try to tell them all the things I wish someone had told me years before I finally took the MSF course.

But I can't do all this convincing alone.

The market for new motorcycle riders is MASSIVE - among women specifically. But the motorcycle industry is just not reaching women. At a time when motorcycle sales are plummeting, the industry should be looking to expand into new markets among women - and, instead, they just keep trying to appeal to white men over 40. Women hold the key to expanding motorcycle sales, but motorcycle manufacturers just keep ignoring us. I do a better job in convenience store parking lots than you do in any of your advertising or sales pitches.

First of all, the best ads for motorcycle riding don't come from motorcycle manufacturers - they come from Geico, Progressive and Booking.com (the last one made me literally burst into tears, ya'll - I gasped and then I bawled). These commercials are about seeing beautiful places, feeding your soul, being with friends or enjoying being alone, and being more than your job or whatever role you need a break from. They are far more motivating than anything coming out of the motorcycle industry.

Motorcycle manufacturers and the Motorcycle Safety Foundation need to take a cue from these inspirational, fun commercials by non-motorcycle manufacturers and produce their own. And they need to come up with commercials specifically to encourage women:

• a woman in a typical office, open floor plan, pulled in various directions, getting passed up for a promotion, seeing a work plan she developed get shade thrown at it by Todd in IT, etc., and as she goes through her typical workday, she gets a secret smile and a far-away look - and we see what she's going to be doing this weekend: riding her motorcycle somewhere beautiful.
   
• a woman in her home, managing kids and her husband and a broken washer and driving kids to this and that and, as she goes through all these home duties, she gets a secret smile and a far-away look - and we see what she's going to be doing while the kids are at school: ride her motorcycle somewhere beautiful, meet other women for coffee, etc. 

Come up with a whole series of these kinds of commercials. Come up with other themes that would appeal to women. And, please, NOT JUST WHITE WOMEN.

Remember that, just like among male riders, there are going to be very different ways women approach motorcycle riding: some are going to like cruising, some are going to like traveling and camping by motorcycle, some are going to want to do back-country discovery routes, some are going to want to ride alone, some are going to want to ride with others, and on and on. That means you are going to have to appeal to the different kinds of potential motorcycle riders.

Also, you need to retrain everyone working in your motorcycle dealerships: salespeople need to welcome every woman that comes through the door, whether she's alone or with a man. Assume she IS a rider, or wants to be one, and talk to her as such. I cannot count how many times I have been utterly ignored when walking into a motorcycle shop.

Other ways to inspire thousands of new motorcycle owners and riders among women:

• Dealerships need to have images of women riding motorcycles posted all-around their shops - not the greasy, almost naked women with boob jobs, but actual women riders - representing a range of economic levels, ages, body types and ethnicities. And they need to use more of these images in their own advertising.
   
• The Motorcycle Safety Foundation needs to have flyers at motorcycle sales shops and need to train salespeople on how to push them.
   
• The Motorcycle Safety Foundation needs to have a representative on particularly busy days at motorcycle dealers, and greet women with, "Hey there, are you a motorcycle rider? Do you want to be one?" and have lots of material to hand out about upcoming classes, be ready to talk in an encouraging way about attending classes and becoming a rider, etc.
   
• Dealerships need to have events like the Harley fantastic women-only "Garage Parties." I am NOT a Harley rider, but I went to their event in 2010 in Gladstone, Oregon and it was OUTSTANDING - and had way more attendees than they were expecting. It was staffed entirely by women (all-male staff left), because new women riders tend to be very self-conscious and self-deprecating, and there's nothing like watching a woman smaller than you pick up an 800-pound bike (362.87 kilos) and then tell you, "YOU can do this." There was great food, short demonstration stations, gift bags, and free t-shirts with I am not a backrest on the back that I still wear. And, of course, Harley doesn't have these events anymore, because why continue a wildly-popular event that, over time, will build momentum for more women to ride motorcycles?
   
• Exploit movie moments like Captain Marvel on a motorcycle. Right after I saw that movie, I went home and started Googling images of her riding her motorcycle. And I was stunned - they were EXTREMELY hard to find and weren't very good - certainly not anything I wanted to share online. Social media should have been FLOODED with her image on that bike! What a missed opportunity!
   
• Pay for product placement in TV shows and movies - pay to have some female characters to be motorcycle riders.

I just gave the motorcycle industry outstanding, excellent ideas that will easily and vastly increase the number of motorcycle owners and riders in the USA. Ya'll should pay me $100,000 for this. $200,000 for this, in fact. And I just gave this to you FOR FREE, you dumb asses at Harley, BMW, Honda, Kawasaki, Suzuki, Yamaha, Royal Enfield and on and on.

Two more things:

• not all women motorcycle riders want pink riding apparel. I have a pink mesh jacket ONLY because it was the only one available. I would have preferred gray or blue.
   
• having the Dakar Rally in Saudi Arabia showed me just how much a lot of people in the motorcycle industry think of women. #boycottdakar

Motorcycle Tour of Northern California & Southwestern Oregon: 11 days, 10 nights, 2095 mile

Motorcycle Tour of Northern California & Southwestern Oregon: 11 days, 10 nights, 2095 miles, September 2019. Includes

• My first stay in a yurt
• Cascade-Siskiyou National Monument
• McArthur Burney Falls State Park
• Salmon River Road between Somes Bar and Cecilville, California
• Shasta-Trinity National Forest
• California state road 36
• Empire Mine State Historic Park and Grass Valley
• Downieville, California
• Janesville, California (they misspelled it!)
• Modoc National Forest
• Bear Camp Coastal Route in Josephine County, Oregon 
• Seeing the Southwestern part of the Oregon Coast
• historic campground stoves
• & my first water crossing!

More about my travels

10 years as a motorcycle rider

10 years ago, in June 2009, I took the Motorcycle Safety Foundation Basic Rider Course in Louisville, Kentucky, a course delivered by the Derby Motorcycle School. In fact, I signed up for the course months before I had even arrived back in the USA, when I was still living in Germany, because I knew these classes fill up quickly.

I got my license just a few days later after finishing the course, in July 2009.

And I'm still a motorcycle rider.

It's 10 years later and I've ridden more than 43,000 miles on my own motorcycle - almost 70,000 kilometers - almost all of it for fun on vacations and the weekends (rather than commuting). I did it on two motorcycles, actually: my first bike was a 1979 Honda Nighthawk, which I bought in November 2009 and road for two years, and now, my 2008 Kawasaki KLR 650, which I got in October 2011.

Via my motorcycles, I've been:

• all the way up through British Columbia, up to the Yukon via the Cassiar Highway and back down the Alaska Highway
   
• to Jasper, Banff and Kootenay National Parks
   
• Yellowstone, Western Montana and Wyoming
   
• all over Nevada, including Great Basin National Park and, of course, Rachel Nevada
   
• Arches, Canyonlands, and Capitol Reef National Parks, and Goblin Valley State Park in Utah
   
• Lava Beds National Monument, Lassen National Monument, Emmets Pass, Devil's Postpile, and lots more of Northern California and everything in between that and where we live in the Portland Metro area.
   
• All Over Idaho - which might not sound like much, but it's one of my favorite trips!
   
• Olympic National Park, Gifford Pinchot National Forest / Southern Washington State - really, and all over Washington state
   
• Steens Mountain, Eastern Oregon, including the Alvord Desert - all over Oregon - like up to Mt. Hebo via Siuslaw National Forest Service Road 14.
   
• And regularly all over Washington, Yamhill, Tillamook, Clatsop, Columbia, Clackamas and Wasco in Oregon, and Skamania and Klickitat counties in Washington state.

My only regret about my motorcycle riding is that I didn't take the MSF Basic Rider Course YEARS SOONER. I looked into it when I lived in Austin, Texas back in the late 1990s, before I moved to Germany, because I thought buying a small motorcycle and using it to get to and from work at the University of Texas would be a much better way of commuting. But I kept talking myself out of it.

Whether someone commutes by motorcycle, does simple cruises on a weekend, goes on epic long-distance trips for weeks or rides off-road, I totally get why people love riding a motorcycle. It's hard to say why I love riding a motorcycle without using clichés. It's so incredibly empowering to ride a motorcycle - it makes me feel stronger and more confident and more capable of handling life. I love how connected I feel to my surroundings on a bike and I love the focus I have on the road and the landscape and the surroundings when I'm riding. I feel so incredibly present when I'm riding, and I do not think about my professional work or cleaning my house or all my many obligations and responsibilities. My mind is completely free of all stress and worries. I'm just riding - turning this corner, taking this curve, stopping at this light, going over this hill. I love the long trips and I love just riding across town and back. I love the challenges: I love doing something I find hard to do, and doing it over and over and getting more and more comfortable doing it - and it may take a few hours or it may take months. I love that the more I practice, the more I ride, the better I get at riding. I love that I'm always improving. I wish everything that needs improving in my life was just a matter of practice.

I love after parking my bike and taking off my helmet and looking up and seeing a group of people staring at me, in surprise or disbelief or awe. I admit that I'd also love it if they frowned or otherwise looked disapprovingly. it shouldn't matter what people are seeing when they see me, but it does, and I like my image as a motorcycle rider - I'm not even going to pretend that doesn't matter. It does.

And I really love meeting people - people are happy to walk up and start talking to my husband and me when we stop on our motorcycles.

Stravaig, which is pronounced straw vague, is an Irish and Scottish word meaning to wander about aimlessly. One goes stravaiging about the roads. Stravaig is probably from an even older and obsolete word extravage, meaning to digress or ramble. I am all about stravaig, both on my motorcycle and in conversations: I love exploring and traveling and I really love exploring and traveling by motorcycle. It is fascinating and challenging and soul-reviving as anything you can experience.  

I don't see how I ever could have weathered the disappointments I've experienced since moving back to the USA, especially professionally, if I wasn't a motorcycle rider. When I get on the bike, I'm not thinking of all the hours I've spent preparing consulting proposals and job applications, hours that, by and large, have been for naught. When I'm on the bike, I'm not second-guessing the choices I've made. It's therapy, it's a mental reboot, it's an oasis, it's a shot of serenity.

Like I said, it's hard to talk about without sounding clichéd.

If you are a woman, I really encourage you to think about becoming a motorcycle rider. I swear it's cheaper than therapy. 

• My advice for getting started as a motorcycle rider
   
• Getting started on a dual sport: my journey (Changing from a cruiser to a dual sport)

To take the MSF Basic Rider Course, you do not have to have even touched a motorcycle, and the classes are available all over the USA (sadly, not in Oregon - they have some other group that does courses - if that's your only option, by all means, do it). All you need for the MSF courses are high-topped shoes (this can be tennis shoes - I used hiking boots), pants (no shorts), long sleeves and any kind of gloves that allow you to operate the controls. If you don't have a helmet, they will provide such. If you study up and take your written motorcycle test and get your permit before this class, you will get your license immediately upon finishing the class and presenting your paperwork to the DMV in most states (otherwise, you have to wait 30 days). Half of my class were women, and at 43, I was not the oldest woman in the class!

There's no obligation to get your license after you take a basic riding course. It's worth the price just to have the experience of trying, I promise. If you don't fall in love with it - if you do it and think, oh, no, not for me, hey, that's okay too! Congrats for trying.

If you do fall in love with it, as I did - see you out on the road.

10 years of motorcycle riding. Here's to at least 25 more!

2018 Nevada motorcycle trip

 

In the last two weeks of July, we went on our annual two-week motorcycle trip. This time, we toured Nevada, as well as parts of Oregon and a wee bit of California. We spent 13 days, going over 2657 miles / 4276 kilometers. We stayed at the historic hotel in French Glen, Oregon, rode around Steens Mountain, rode most of US Highway 50 in Nevada (the "loneliest road in the USA"), visited Eureka, Ely, Rachel and Tonopah, Nevada, stayed two nights in Great Basin National Park, stayed a night in Cathedral Gorge State Park and took the Extraterrestrial Highway.

You can read the travelogue or go straight to the photos.

As always, my goal isn't so much hey, look what I did! as it is here's advice if you want to do something similar.

Motorcycle trip in Washington State: a Smokey Adventure

I just realized that I didn't link to my travelogue about our annual motorcycle trip. This year, it was 10 days in Washington State: a Smokey Motorcycle Adventure in August.

Our 2017 trip included Gifford Pinchot National Forest (our favorite), Mt. Rainier National Park, Wenatchee National Forest (new for us), Lake Chelan National Recreation Area (new for us), North Cascades National Forest (new for us), Mt. Baker-Snoqualmie National Forest (new for us), Olympic National Forest (new for us), and Olympic National Park (new for us), as well as Trout Lake and Packwood, which we've been to before, plus these new cities for us in Washington state: Naches, Ellensburg, Leavenworth, Methow, Chelan, Winthrop, Newhalem, Marblemount, Concrete, Oak Harbor, Amanda Park, Humptulips and Aberdeen.

As a result of our Washington state trip, of August 30, 2017, I have ridden 23,496 miles (37,813 km) on my KLR (Kawasaki). I've ridden 34,496 (55,516 km) overall on motorcycles (my previous bike was a Honda Nighthawk).

But what's even more fun to think about is not the number of miles or kilometers, but the things I've seen. And that's why I write travelogues.

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Motorcycle Adventure Mostly in Idaho

This year's two-week motorcycle adventure tour? Idaho! And it was amazing. A couple of people gave incredulous responses when we said we were going to Idaho for our vacation. After motorcycle trips to the Yukon and back, to Jasper and Banff, Yellowstone, national parks in Utah, and, of course, travel all over Europe, we were going to Idaho?

Yes. It was my idea. I was ready for an adventure closer to home, one that didn't require us to ride for 700 miles over two days on the Interstate just to start a vacation. We'd seen a bit of Idaho every time we went over Lolo Pass for other trips, and we'd been to Craters of the Moon already, which we hugely enjoyed. If we concentrated mostly on Idaho for two weeks, we would, at last, see Hells Canyon, a legendary destination for motorcycle riders, and allow us to explore more the North East of Oregon, something we hadn't done yet since moving here in 2009.

Here is the route we went. Unfortunately, this map doesn't have many city names on it.All of the photos from the trip are online, with descriptions; in fact, I also put all the photos for Silver City, Idaho into their own photo album as well.

Here are the travel point highlights:

• Hells Canyon drive from Oxbow Bridge along the Snake River to the Hell's Canyon dam and then back over Oxbow dam to Cambridge, Idaho
• Historic Silver City, Idaho 
• Bruneau Dunes State Park, Idaho 
• City of Rocks National Reserve, Idaho 
• Sawtooth Scenic Byway, Idaho 
• Salmon River Scenic Byway, Idaho 
• Historic Custer, Idaho 
• Ft. Missoula, Montana 
• Wallace, Idaho 
• Lake Coeur d'Alene, Idaho 
• White Pine Scenic Byway, Idaho 
• Hell's Canyon Overlook, Oregon 
• Joseph, Oregon 
• Painted Hills, Oregon 
• Little Crater Lake, Oregon

Here is the Idaho travelogue

Maybe I should take it back...

I'm kind of regretting that blog about Will I ever not be a novice motorcycle rider?. I posted a link to it on a discussion group for women adventure riders. Some of the advice I got in replies was quite good. But a lot wasn't at all.

I got chastised for how I ride from people who have never seen me ride. I got advice that showed people hadn't actually read the blog (like regarding where I might find a dirt and gravel expert to mentor me for a day). I got a long essay about "covering your clutch" and"clutch feathering" and "dry clutch" - I don't know what ANY of that means...

I also got a couple of statements about how I needed to get another bike. That makes me crazy. I love my motorcycle. Stefan has done so much to it to make it fit for me to ride, and I'm just not willing to downgrade yet. It also was frustrating - I wondered if men got this same advice if they ever admitted to what I admitted to. Of course, male motorcycle riders NEVER admit to any weakness, so... ;-)

Motorcycle riding keeps me humble, that's for sure. I'm an expert in a lot of things, but I'll never be an expert at that.

One person said I was going to have to accept that I was going to drop my bike more than once. Goodness knows I dropped my Nighthawk more than once... always when I was trying to park. But I've done so well at keeping this KLR 650 looking so beautiful - I want it to always be beautiful...

What I've decided I need, instead of the advice I was offered:

• To start doing arm and hand exercises three times a week
• To make and follow a plan to lose 20 pounds (weight loss helped me SO much on my first bike - less between my thighs means better foot placement)
• To take Stefan at his word that he's not going to get mad when I drop the bike. Especially if I dent his fabulous panniers. 
• To do my best at the Team Oregon class I'm going to take next month - and maybe even schlep up to Vancouver, Washington and take the Motorcycle Safety Foundation bike bonding class as well
• To keep riding
• To not share so much online about my motorcycle riding abilities.

Will I ever not be a novice motorcycle rider?

I've been riding a motorcycle now for almost seven years. And I still say I'm a novice rider.

It must be wonderful to grow up riding dirt bikes. When I see motorcycle riders now that seem so utterly comfortable, so at-one with their motorcycles, and I get the chance to talk to them, it always turns out that they started riding dirt bikes as a teen - even a pre-teen.

My husband didn't ride dirt bikes. He didn't start riding a motorcycle regularly until he was 27, yet, by 30, he was riding his motorcycle with such incredible grace and confidence and, well, I would say perfection, like he had been doing it for oh-so-long. I'm not saying he could do the Dakar Rally, but nothing seems to intimidate him as a rider, not sharp turns on a hill, not turning around on a hill on a one-lane road, not gravel.

Me, on the other hand... I'm Ms. Barely-the-Speed-Limit off the interstate. All motorcyclists and drivers hate being behind me off the interstate. Let's face it: 99% of riders and drivers go at least 10 miles over the speed limit, even on winding, narrow roads. I go around curves as quickly as I feel comfortable, and that always turns out to be the speed limit. I'd be okay with that if it weren't for the long line of cars and motorcycles that often end up behind me, or that one car following too close, or seeing my husband in my mirror and knowing he'd so love to be going faster.

But I think if you see me riding, even if you are following me, you don't think I'm a novice rider - just an overly-cautious one. I think my form is pretty good, and I really do enjoy riding off of main road (the freeway, and anything with lots of traffic lights). I enjoy gravel that isn't too complicated - I was going up and down Dixie Mountain Road and Otto Miller Road with quite a lot of confidence in 2013 and 2014. I've had a bit of a set back in confidence since my wreck in Utah last year. But I'm getting more and more comfortable again. If I didn't still really enjoy riding a motorcycle, I'd quit - and I still really do so enjoy it, and I want to not only keep riding in the USA, but do more ambitious trips in Mexico and Chile in the coming years.

But if you see me when I park my motorcycle, or leave a parking place, you know I'm still a novice rider. And it's during those times when I think - maybe I'll never get this. And it's when a lot of people watch me and think, wow, she's a novice. She must have just gotten her license last month.

The areas that I just cannot master so far - or even just feel comfortable with:

• Sharp turns immediately after an uphill stop
• Stopping and starting on an incline
• Turning around on an incline
• Parking (if it involves any of the above, to park or to get out of my parking place)

I loathe driving in cities because they involve all of the aforementioned. The idea of driving in Portland, even Beaverton, and especially Oregon City, makes me start sweating profusely - even just sitting here on the couch, not about to ride anywhere.

How do I practice these things? How do you practice something that, if you get wrong, you drop your bike?

I really need a one-on-one class to work on these things with someone who really knows what they are doing and how to transfer those skills. I'd love a class on how to better ride on dirt and gravel as well - especially how to stop. Stefan has been really wonderful teaching me dirt and gravel riding techniques, but we both think another person, who is really comfortable teaching novices, would be so helpful. But I cannot find such a class.

I have emailed and called and left a message with a training center in Washington state that shall remain nameless that offers a range of dirt bike and ADV rider courses, but they never called or emailed me back. I finally got someone via IM chat, but he wasn't clear on what class he thought I should take - and even suggested one class that seemed more about learning to camp via motorcycle - which I am quite experienced at doing - than a class to teach me the skills I need.

I took the Advanced Rider Training class with Team Oregon, and it did help me with cornering, but I got the impression the class is really about learning to go AS FAST AS POSSIBLE, safely, around curves. I'm just not interested in going fast... though I'd like to go faster, and this course did help. I also got the impression that the instructors were frustrated with me - they didn't like that I just couldn't go as fast as the other riders. It wasn't a nurturing environment - just a "Here's how you do it. Now do it. Okay, you didn't do it right, so I'll tell you again." I'll be trying another Team Oregon course, Rider Skills Practice (RSP), in May, since it's all I can find. Unfortunately, Motorcycle Safety Foundation courses aren't offered in Oregon - I loved their basic rider's course back in Kentucky (so supportive, so clear, so fun!), and I would SO love to take its Ultimate Bike-Bonding RiderCourse (patterned after police training courses).

And I'd still love to find a one-on-one trainer to help me with those bulleted items, and with riding better on dirt and gravel. Anyone?

I am always aspiring to be a better motorcycle rider. Always. I sure would like some help in that quest.

Travelogue for two-week motorcycle trip in Utah & Nevada

Two-Week Motorcycle Tour, Mostly in Utah, Nevada & Oregon
June 2014
2989 miles / 4810.329 kilometers

I've put the blog on the travel portion of my web site, with plenty of photos:

• Part One
• Part Two (the crash!)
• Part Three

In case you don't want to read the entire travelogue, but want some quick advice for your own motorcycle trip to the area, then here is a list of the very best of times, the absolute highest of highlights:

• The host at the Farewell Bend Oregon State Park (I LOVE volunteer camp hosts!)
• Cleveland-Lloyd Dinosaur Quarry
• Capitol Reef National Park (the most under-rated national park)
• Goblin Valley (so overlooked! so fabulous!)
• Camping in a cow pasture in the deserts of Nevada (yes, again)
• Sheldon National Wildlife Refuge

2013 in review

I’m glad to be saying goodbye to 2013. It’s been a really tough year - but is there any other kind since moving back to the USA?

Even a tough year has highlights, and here they are:

We moved into our house - the first either of us have ever owned - in mid January. I still wonder if it was the right decision for us - it’s a beautiful house, but this year, it meant no vacations at all - we didn’t camp at all this year as well. The house completely dominated our lives. In addition to moving in, Stefan’s parents came for six weeks to spend most of their vacation painting the interior and putting in laminate floors! But I still consider it a highlight - I have enjoyed gardening in the front yard and being told by so many passersby that they are so glad we bought this house, and I do think it's a beautiful house inside (still not crazy at how it looks outside).

Getting to know Forest Grove. We went to SakeOne's Annual Pacific Rim Festival, the Sidewalk Chalk Art Festival and the July 4 fireworks show, we tried out several restaurants, and we walked around the historic neighborhood where we live a LOT. I so love the houses here, and watching the flora change with the seasons. We got asked for our house to be on the annual tour of historic homes, and that resulted in our getting to see into many of the houses I’ve admired from outside, as well as meeting a lot of really nice people who came to our house. The contrast to our experience in Canby is startling - and very welcomed. I so wish we'd moved here instead in 2009.

Visit with my sister back in Kentucky. It’s hard for me to write about this without getting emotional. For the first time in many, many years, I felt at home in Henderson. Hanging out with my sister and her family was therapy I’ve needed for a long, long time. I’ll be doing it again in 2014, for sure.

Stefan is a firefighter in the USA at last. This has been such a huge struggle. In the first city we lived in, Canby, the fire station wouldn’t even call him back after he submitted his application - which they lost at least once - and acted like he was a huge burden any time he contacted them. I was afraid he was going to give up altogether. The 3 months of training he did here in Forest Grove meant more sacrifices in doing anything fun, and he was really stressed out trying to balance work and studying, but the grin he had on his face after his first shift made it all worth it.

A motorcycle ride in Tillamook State Forest in Oregon. While we didn’t have a vacation at all this year, and never camped eve once, we did discover a really terrific gravel paradise near our home: Tillamook State Forest. There are OHV trails all around here, but on the day we were there, we stayed off of them - we don't have permits, because neither of us have the bikes for those kinds of conditions, and I certainly don’t have the skills for such. Instead, we stuck to the main gravel roads, and had a terrific time. We will definitely be seeing a lot more of these roads in 2014. We did a few more interesting day trips as well by motorcycle.

Insulation installation in the crawl space. Okay, this is a weird one to include in a list of highlights. But this was my first home improvement project, and given my extreme fear of spiders, it was a major deal that I did this. Our crawl space is only about 3 feet high, and I spent many hours down there - but I didn't spend even 1/3 as much time as Stefan did!

My EU contract. This was also a low-point in the year. Getting the contract was a huge ego boost, and doing the work was terrific. But the pushback against my findings was surprising and hurtful. It was surreal to be criticized for being “exhaustively comprehensive” and “too grassroots instead of staying at the institution level” regarding my research. I take those comments as compliments, even though they weren’t intended that way, and I’m very proud of the work I did.

Finishing my book. Is there a nonprofit organization you love and support? Then I hope you will consider buying a copy for such - it will be on sale by January 2014.

Trip to Belgium. Okay, this actually was a horrible trip. But I got out of the USA, something I wasn’t able to do in 2012.

My absolute best gift that I got for Christmas 2012: Albi. Back in the Spring, I didn't think she was going to finish 2013. That she's still here with us, and comfortable and happy, is a glorious thing. 17 years old, blind, will still try to bite any cat that gets too close to her face, and still melts at the touch of Stefan Dietz (but, then again, so do I). And we actually got to hear her bark one more time - loudly - late in the year, when a neighbor with two dogs came to the front door. She couldn't see them, but she could hear and smell them, and a few minutes after they left, she let loose with the howl bark. I so wish I had a recording! Who knows if we will ever get to hear this again.

Gray Max the cat. He was abandoned more than a year ago, and is fed by my somewhat crazy neighbor. He showed up in our back yard one night while we enjoyed a fire, and then kept coming any time we were outside, sitting on the porch and seeming to listen to us talk. Then one night, I dared to pick him up and put him on my lap - and it turned out that’s what he’d wanted all along. He’s a total lap cat, loves to purr and cuddle. I can’t believe someone abandoned this cat! I’ve never fed him - and I don’t need to, because crazy neighbor feeds him PLENTY - but he shows up a few times every day, crying to be held and petted.

Walking my neighbor's dogs. In addition to taking in Max, my crazy neighbor has a therapy dog and a dog she took in that she found a couple of years ago tied to a tree in a forest, shot with a BB gun. The rescued dog - a massive pit bull mix that looks like a hound from hell - is named Daisy. Yes, she named her Daisy. And while it doesn't fit her looks, it does fit her personality: she lives to please humans. She's dog aggressive, but one firm "OFF, DAISY" and she's right by my side, not growling at all. That never worked with Wiley! I'm walking these dogs because Daisy is horribly overweight and was so anxiety-ridden that she had created huge sores on her right front leg from incessant licking. After three months of walking, the sores are gone and she's lost at least 5 pounds, maybe more. She's got to lose 30, at least. My crazy neighbor is also quite lazy - she doesn't walk with us. She makes our mentally-challenged neighbor do it.

So... those are my highlights of 2013. Kinda... sad. Really sad, in fact. 10 years ago, my highlights included going to Egypt and meeting Kofi Annan and interviewing Sharon Capeling-Alakija and adopting Albi and going to Prague and seeing the Dixie Chicks. Five years ago my year's highlights were touring Eastern Europe by motorcycle and visiting Munich and taking a four-hour motorcycle course. Heck, even last year, my highlights were touring Nevada and Northern California by my own motorcycle and going white-water rafting for the first time.

Wow. Now I'm depressed.